Six months post-the world we once knew

On February 29, 2020, I spent the day in Ushuaia, Argentina before boarding my cruise ship bound for Antarctica. I woke up in a hostel dorm room and used the shared bathroom. I ate a community breakfast around strangers and chatted with others in the common room, as we all sat close together on the floor, charging our phones around the small handful of outlets in the corner. I walked through the city’s shops, ate lunch inside a restaurant and made new friends on the street.

I had no idea as I was boarding the ship that I was saying goodbye to the world as I knew it, and not for just the 16-day cruise.

On March 15, 2020, I returned from sailing to Antarctica, South Georgia and the Falkland Islands for 16 days. It was an absolute dream trip (more on that later), but the world we returned to was drastically different from the one we had left. We had no idea what had unfolded while we were sailing around the bottom of the earth, and got smacked in the face with it upon our return.

That was six months ago today. Six months ago, I returned from one of the best experiences of my life to this chaotic hell. Six months ago, I got flung full on into a global pandemic. Six months ago, the wide, wonderful world that I had grown to love and yearned to so badly explore had unknowingly gotten taken away from me, from everybody. And six months later, we still don’t know when we’re getting it back.

Well that was grim, but it’s reflective of how I’m feeling today. That said, here’s the positive spin that I’m putting to it as I process where I’m at now, my mental health, what has happened and what has changed for me since returning:

Would I have done anything differently, knowing that the world we once knew was ending? Knowing that at least for the near future, things are still going to be drastically different, unknown and scary? Knowing that probably, even when things get back to “normal”, that it will never quite be the same? Thankfully, I can confidently say no. I feel like I lived my 26 years in that old world to the fullest. And even though now, six months after I left it, though I still wholeheartedly ache for what once was, I know in my heart that I took full advantage of that world and all it had to offer. I know that even though my (and everybody else’s) mental health, productivity and general outlook on the world is at its lowest point right now, I need to continue to look forward and keep finding opportunities for adventure and joy to get through this. It will get better. I just need to focus on the small wins and appreciate the simple joys that I can find until then. ❤️